Back in hospital

I went to see Dad at the weekend and was surprised to see a *totally* different person. The long and short of it is that he was happy, smiling, joking and much more like his old self. Given the previous visit - and although the experience itself was very enjoyable - I was a little alarmed at this turn of events.

It transpires that Dad has had is medication changed. Instead of being on a 25mg or 50mg morphine patch he is now on a 75mg patch and the "lollipops" are now being upped to 400mg - they'd kill pain in a bull elephant...

Dad was flying as high as a kite. It was an eye-opener. It made me happy to see and talk to the "old Dad" but the gloss was worn off knowing why it was happening. Also the occaisional cog-slipping event didn't help - he'd talk to my Sister and call her my Mum's name.

He's had a bone scan and the results were clear. That means the secondaries aren't in his spine which is good news but the pain he gets is from the spinal collapse he's having. He is also due to have CT scan to see what's happening in his brain. The Doctor's seem to have some concern about the brain - he was readmitted with odd side effects to the chemo. It may well be that secondaries have made it there...

Finally, the Occupational Therapists are making noises about Dads discharge. Discharge? You what? Thing is, no-one has spoken to Mum about Dad coming home - she's only just recovered from the last burst. When you factor in that Dad is essentially doubly incontinent, bed ridden and in constant pain (allbeit under controlling medication) it is hard to see how she is going to cope. She has been offered home help but - get this - she will have to PAY for it. They save money by chucking Dad out of Hospital and once he gets home he's going to have to pay for his care. Mum simply isn't strong enough to do the things that need to be done with a bedridden man. She's strong but she's no Hercules.

We do what we can but we can't be with her 24/7...

This sucks...